Day 1 and Day 2
I came to University Malaya Medical Center emergency ward at 3am. I am distressed that I cannot socialize in group, loud, fun, spontaneous, felt left out during church fellowship. I waited in the Bilik Lili, a male nurse came and asks me why I’m here and the medicines I am taking. Then, the psychiatrist, Dr. Marini came and asks me why I’m here and then talk to my dad privately to tally my account. My dad says the psychiatrist says I have to be admitted to the ward because I may injure myself.
The nurse took my blood and put a blood plug on my hand and I am wheeled to the psychiatric ward. It was 4am. While I am at my bed, in front of me, there’s an uncle. The uncle is a chinese with muslim wife. I slept and woke up at 8am. They served me bread with red bean and butter. Later, they will ask me what I want to eat for lunch and dinner. I changed into the blue patient clothes and the pants are hard to tie.
My neighbours are the chinese alcoholic guy, an indian male about my age, Dinesh, which has Schizophrenia. He always walk around and stops. There are only about 12 patients and some nurses. We can only walk within the red lines at both ends of the ward. The visiting hours are 3pm to 7pm. I try to make friends. Some student doctors talk to me, asking me routine questions. There is a student doctor named Johnny which is friendly, he told me he is an extreme introvert but am flexible, he dislikes orientation also and labeled as asocial but he has his stand. He talks to me for about 2 hours. He spends 80% of the time alone but is “kiasu”, so spends Sunday taking case histories to increase his case history taking skills. He says that he could sit at the bed beside me because I am too normal.
There is also a Chinese student doctor which looks like Dr. Vincent who take histories from me. He looks like an introvert and rarely smiles. My parents brought shampoo, towels, biscuits, colgate, sandals, and some books for me. At night, someone took my blood pressure. There is a room behind which supposedly we can play carom, draw, and stuff.
The chinese muslim guy has alcoholic, which causes delirium, can see hallucination. Professor brought a bunch of students here to observe him.
There are some politics in the ward. Food sharing brough by relatives are pieces of power. Not to mention cigarette. Mental health is defined as the state where you functioning is not impaired. The nurses likes to chat, some laugh a lot. The patients spend time chatting also. The student doctor says I am quite sane.
The nurses here are friendly, learn to small talk like them. I bathe once a day but some people no bath, messy hair.
Slept not very well. Knew a friend known as Adidas. He talked to Redzuan (Chinese alcoholic guy). He works at hotel and wife works in this hospital. I borrowed my sweater to him because he was cold. He has bipolar.
A male Indian psychiatrist talks to me. Everyone is unique. Everyone has strengths. Not everyone can be outgoing. Don’t act outgoing, are you being outgoing or acting outgoing? What happens during childhood and now? Didn’t learn adult communication? Feel sad and hopeless most of the time. Don’t like my personality now. Why did I take Ritalin?
Two medical students came and see me. Fourth and third year. I talked about my past quitting or avoiding as coping mechanism. There is activity behind the ward. I like the activity and exercise. The exercise makes me happy.
Another student doctor interviews me. I’m considered the most sane person here.
I find student doctor life interesting, they are good at learning at becoming a doctor. Maybe I can bring this spirit to the programmer world.
Redzuan says I treat the student doctors very well after I told him I have social problems and maybe will discharge today.